I spend a lot of time fretting over life's challenges in a non-Zen-like manner, much like I used to do before I heard my cancer diagnosis. I had hoped that I had risen above this madness, that my cancer battle's victory gave me wings to fly over the lowly stresses in life.
In short, I'm having a bad day. But, as a cancer survivor, I know the value of each day and I don't want to waste one. I feel guilty.
Illness reminds us that we are mortal (not winged) beings, here on this green earth for a short time. Cancer threatens to make that short time even shorter.
So why not just kick back and smell the spring flowers?
Well, the damned spring flowers have not yet sprung here in cold country.
There is an expectation that, once having fought the breast cancer battle, women come out stronger than ever, invincible to stress. Priorities are clear, things are not blown out of proportion. Cancer, like a calm lens, keeps our focus.
Nope.
It's the journey, not the disease that brings forth these subtle transformations. The gains and losses made along the way teach us that we are stronger than we know.
I'll go for a walk and read a book, good things that make me happy and make this day count.
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