Saturday, April 4, 2009

My Estrogen is Missing!


I never saw it coming. Here I am, trying to be a good little blogger, kind and respectful of others, believing in Karma and, you won't believe this: someone took my estrogen! Why do bad things happen to good people?!
And I missed the red flags along the way.
I didn't read my breast cancer textbook. Too scary. And I didn't like its cover, little vulnerable peach roses across it. What? I have cancer and you want me to think of cut flowers, already on their way to demise? I want Medusa, the feminists' symbol of female fury on that breast cancer textbook's cover!
My oncologist, diva that she is, tops my list of suspects. When we met, she said, "your estrogen is a pain in my axx." I liked her instantly. But I thought she was going to wait to shut off the estrogen faucet until after surgery, some time off in that distant future, the one that I can't think about right now.
And I was wrong.
The book, Your Breast Cancer Treatment Handbook, written by oncology nurse Judy Kneece, describes chemo induced menopause as PMS symptoms, "increased moodiness, tearfulness, nervousness, and outbursts of anger," as common occurrences except that PMS is temporary. According to the textbook, chemo throws you into an "emotional limbo that remains day after day because the hormones do not return to reverse the withdrawal." Yes, I am pissed off!
Let's see now ... that makes me psycho cancer bitch any time, any where for undetermined duration. Be forewarned.
This is why my husband travels.

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